my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
