Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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