Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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