I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
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Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
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you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.