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My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
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