Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
