I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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