She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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