i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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