i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
