I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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