we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
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I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
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I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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