i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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