You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
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