What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
