wrigley field is MILF paradise
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Green mimosas i think yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Randomize