im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
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