I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
we made out on top of his cat.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
