carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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