The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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