I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
