i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Randomize
