Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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