i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
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You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.