I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
