This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
