Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
