separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
