Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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