Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
