Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Randomize
