CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
