he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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