I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
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