He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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