hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize