I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
You just made me feel so damn special
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Randomize
