I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
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I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
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Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
So apparently I’m into choking now
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