I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Randomize