i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
How does it feel to date your dad?
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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