She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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