So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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