Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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