Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize