How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
