What a fucking waste of an outfit
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
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