kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize