I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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