whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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