I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Randomize
