a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Randomize
