nut hugger
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
